It seems that Patricia “Tanning Mom” Krentcil, the mother who has gained notoriety for allegedly taking her 5-year-old into a tanning bed (reportedly resulting in serious skin burns), is stretching her 15 minutes of fame with the help of the Frito-Lay company – makers of Cheetos. The company won a heated bidding war with Wilson, the makers of the Official NFL gameday football. Several big-time tanneries also threw their hats in the ring, but when the money started flying they were quickly priced out of contention.
Krentcil, who used the Wilson football as a measuring tool to determine her optimal tan, was swayed by the six figure deal offered by the snack food giant.
Of course, it’s not all good news. Cheetos released its long-time spokesperson, Chester Cheetah. Friends close to Chester report that he was demoralized by the dismissal and has started aggressively snorting Dorito dust, his drug of choice. The unemployed cheetah is trying to make ends meet as a greeter at his local Wal-Mart.
Your handsome and humble servant-