Trump Gropes All Three Christmas Ghosts Attempting to Visit Him

NEW YORK– In an unprecedented development, the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future met yesterday to determine whether or not they would be joining the ever-growing line of those publicly accusing the President Elect of the United States of sexual assault. All three ghosts claim to have gone to Trump Tower in New York during Trump’s pre-tweeting hours with the intention of guiding him towards a personal epiphany....

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