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Anti-Immigrant Rhetoric is Republican Viagra

It shouldn’t have taken this long to figure out, but the angry anti-immigration rhetoric that’s been around since just after the arrival of the Nina, Pinta, and Santa Maria apparently has a biological origin. Researchers at Johns Hopkins have made undeniable connections between angry anti-immigration rhetoric and sexual arousal within a significant portion of the population suffering from erectile dysfunction. Many cases of...

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Top Five Easy Ways To Discredit Occupy Wall Street

After an initial media blackout, the Occupy Wall Street movement has gotten increasing media attention, and, expectedly, the detractors have their claws out now. For those wishing to effectively undermine the movement in quick and effortless Fox-News-esque strokes follow these five easy suggestions:  5. Treat protestors like naive children who must be protected from themselves and don’t understand deep economic complexities of...

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How to Celebrate Columbus Day: Smack the Doughnut From Your Coworkers’ Hand, Claim It As Your Own, Then Give Them Smallpox

How to Celebrate Columbus Day: Smack the Doughnut From Your Coworkers’ Hand, Claim It As Your Own, Then Give Them Smallpox

There is a secret I’d like to share with you. Today is the only day of the year where you have Carte Banche to take whatever your gluttonous heart desires from others and claim it as your own, without legal repercussions. That’s right, unofficially law enforcement will look the other way as you get what is rightfully yours on Columbus Day. But, you’re surely asking, “What have you done today, El Guapo? How have you...

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Class Warfare, The Board Game: Release Your Anger, Frustration in a Non-Threatening Way, 99%ers (#occupywallstreet)

Class Warfare, The Board Game: Release Your Anger, Frustration in a Non-Threatening Way, 99%ers (#occupywallstreet)

Throughout the country protesters have gathered in the financial centers of major cities to voice frustrations over corporate greed, and, in the movement’s opinion, to bring attention to Wall Street’s deliberate and continuing exploitation of the bottom 99% of the country. Protestors clearly hellbent on destroying the nation have, in some instances, even clashed violently with authorities. More than 800 protestors, for instance,...

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