El Guapo would like to apologize in advance for anyone expecting what he normally attempts to pass off as humor.  You won’t get too much of that in this one.  Occasionally, El Guapo loses his mind.  Read on. So, here’s the thing.  The so called little things matter.  Quite a bit and quite often.  In fact, usually they’re not so little at all. Each human life is influenced significantly by a myriad of swirling obvious and...

Throughout history, Jesus Christ’s name has been connected to everything from justifying heinous acts of violence to, when shouted, making you feel better after stubbing a toe. (He’s commonly referenced in thank you speeches by athletes, actors, porn stars and tyrants. One has to assume that Christ is an avid fan of the aforementioned groups.) However, after many years of only appearing in grilled cheese and sweat stain form,...

This piece is from Sept. 2010, Mexico’s Bicentennial. Originally published in the late Cafe Magazine. An oldie worth revisiting… Mexico: 200 Sinverguenza Years and Counting Mexico celebrates its bicentennial this September (2010).  For nations, as birthdays go, this is the quinceanera of celebrations.  It’s when a country blooms into womanhood, wears a big puffy dress, and declares to the world “Here I stand, world,...

One of El Guapo’s favorite past times is to start random, booming chants of “USA!” in public spaces. Often, this patriotic act will be preceded and/or followed by things being set on fire. This, after all, is what it means to be an American.  (Setting things on fire, in addition to binge eating and napping, complete the ultranationalist trifecta.) Fireworks, pick-up trucks, shrubs, and abandoned buildings are the objects...

We know you called no take backs, but El Guapo and the folks at The Daily Refried Offices are begging to be done with this new, improved racism 2.0. It’s like Pepsi Clear (remember the short-lived rampage that companies were on in the 80′s where they thought we wanted to see through everything?) Anyway, like Pepsi Clear we tried it and we no likey. We’d much prefer a return to our old, worn (but oddly comfortable),...